A Life of Flavor

Choices

2009-01-29T22:05:47Z

I was stuck. In an old hotel that resembled a mansion from the 1800s, I was told I could walk into any room and that my choice would be important. I walked into a room on the left and as soon as I entered, all the doors closed shut and locked me in. A skinny man wearing a battered top hat stood there with a chicken in his hand. "You must either kill this chicken or have sex with me," he said.
I thought well that's easy. But then I looked to my right and Erik appeared near my side. As it happens in my dreams, I suddenly recalled a sense of responsibility--vaguely, as if it hadn't existed to me a moment before. I politely asked Erik if he'd mind me having sex with the man holding the chicken. He looked a little put off, but said "Well, if you must, I guess I don't mind."
"I'll have sex with you," I said to the man.
I did, then a door opened and I walked into the next room.

I don't exactly remember what the second choice was, but it involved violence versus sex again. I chose sex. In all the rooms following that one which were many, I chose sex, each time apologizing to Erik before I did so. After trying all the doors first, it got to the point where I didn't even wait for a choice to be presented, I just started having sex with anyone in the room so I could find a way back to the main lobby again. I entered a gentlemen's lounge full of cigar smoke and booze. I surveyed the area and counted about a dozen men at the bar alone. It was noisy and busy so when I tore at my hair in frustration, no one seemed to notice. I started on a rough-looking drunk, asking if he would like to have sex with me. We started. Everything got blurry and chaotic, then suddenly (and luckily) I didn't have to experience anything more from that room.

I was transported back to the main lobby. Erik was beside me. He pointed to a room on the right. "That's the room you're supposed to enter," he said.

I walked in. A decent sized group of intellects and students were crowded around an oval shaped bar in the middle of the room. At my right, a speaker was behind the bar, standing on a stool, shouting, proclaiming something with all the fervor he could muster. I looked to my left. There, at the other end, sat Leonardo da Vinci. He was scratching at his short red and white beard listening, but more importantly musing something on his own, intently. He looked at me with bright blue eyes and spoke. As he did so, I told myself I must remember his words.

"It is better to desire much, than many," he said.

In the next moment, I woke up with a hangover.

the start of a dream journal, i call this one "Nationalist Pride"

2009-01-29T21:14:11Z

i believe i'm going to use this as my dream journal.

i'll start with one i had pretty recently

I was in a northern european country--in a theatre--watching a children's play. There was a woman on stage dressed in a frilled blue and white checkered dress leading the children dancing around her in a song. "Schlak dahmen ya tsuvar, sven si hamen vo!!!" they were singing. Anywhere in reality, this statement is probably nonsense, but in my dream, it was translated in my head immediately. They were singing "In our country, when the children are happy, they smile!" and other lines such as "In our country, when the children are happy, they sing!" ...and laugh ...and dance!" and so forth in escalating excitement with each successive line. I laughed and told myself that's ridiculous. It doesn't matter what country you're in. When children are happy anywhere in the world, they smile and sing and laugh and dance.
Before I exited the theatre, I realized that nationalism is by all accounts, absurd.

whaaaaaaaaaaa?!

2008-08-09T20:01:34Z

Erik, my wonderful beau, and I are sitting in Bongo Java, a local coffee shop, with our laptops across from each other.
"B-3."
"Sunk!"
We're supposed to be looking for jobs.
Instead I find an article titled "The lost years of Jesus/St. Issa." Apparently someone named Nicolas Notovitch journeyed through India and Tibet and while passing through, came across some ancient scrolls providing evidence that Jesus spent time in that area of the world between the ages of 13 and 29.
( http://reluctant-messenger.com/issa.htm )

Needless to say, that started me on an endless tangent of distraction from the task at hand.
And to think, it lead me here! To a random link in an old buried email directing me to my once tended-to livejournal. I forgot it existed!
And how wonderful this feeling is! To remember what was gradually blurred or removed from my precious memory by three years of consistent brain damage or what i like to call "the celebration of life." Oh yes I partied. I still do. Though not as much. I can definitely remember what happened last week though last month's probably pushing it.

I have a band called the Janissary. We have a show tonight at Windows on the Cumberland, a lovely dive whose bartenders receive 15-second-long embraces along with a hefty tip from me at the end of the night. Boots, the owner, is a darling of an ol' drunkard--or at least whenever I see him--which in the past has been late at night with a couple substances swimming through my brain. Many nights at this place I've spent dancing my ass off to psychadelic space rock, ol' hippy love ballads, backwoods bluegrass, and of course the ol' fashioned Nashville jams tipsy with the blues. And then I've also had the pleasure to watch ragamuffins like me, dance to the music my gypsy funk trip-hop band's playing which is fantastic to feel. Anyway, if you haven't been to a show already, know that you'll feel swept by a sort of magic as you leave late in the evening. i'm not kidding! no really! i'm serious, look at this face, would it lie to you for a chance at a decent fanbase and a possible income from living a life of partying? why...noooooooo.

Erik wants something to eat. He has hunger. I must obey his desires in all my days under the sun. I must be submissive to him under a thousand moons. I am a woman who is under my man's sheltering wing. Let the spirit of the eagle soar.

No really I gotta go. I'll be back though, with more slack on the harness on my weirdness than ever before.
I'll never leave you now that I've found you livejournal...never.

Until then, try this link on for size. Your eyes will leak.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zVNTdWbVBgc

deluxe_efflux @ 2005-06-17T01:19:00

2005-06-17T06:22:49Z

What have I been doing all summer? Well let me tell you. I've been absorbing what little pleasures my five senses will allow at once and it's been phantasmagorical. I've been kayaking, bonfiring on the beach, swimming on secluded shores and resting in the shade of my own reflection. About a week ago, John and I went on a beauteous bike ride on the backroads of the North Fork at three in the morning. Gliding in and out of the night's shady nooks, he and I shouted at each other in English school-children accents through the air.
"John! Where did you put the raspberries!"
"I've got them right 'ere in my pocket!"

Ahh, kayaking was great because I was reminded of the various wildlife that dwells here in my town, it's amazing! Birds, birds, birds, that's all I have to say (swans included).

Lord Steven and I took a good day yesterday to drive around vineyard roads and sit near murky creeks, talking of anything that came to our heads. We also sat on a cliff way above the sea and talked of death. I don't particularly enjoy talks of death, but this one absorbed into my soul in such a peaceful manner as to make me want more, more voice considering the weight of it all, more life.
While driving down one street, we passed a driveway with two small children playing in it. As we rode passed them, the little boy mooned us as the little girl smiled. Steven and I laughed with pure joy. I couldn't have felt luckier to experience one of that boy's freest moments of life. Steven commented, "I would've liked to pay him money for such a true performance."

Tonight, Lace, Steph, and I chilled out. Last night was better actually. After hangin with Lace, Steph and I had another night in the toolshop. Girltalk while we drill. As usual. Unlike last time in which we were situationed beyond belief while my dad tried to interfere with the shell necklace processing, this time we had a good ol' bottle of Pindar's red merlot. I don't know when it started, but Steph started rabbling and I decided to take notes so I took a Billy Lamont poetry book that I found at the bottom of a pail and wrote all I heard. It was beautiful, raw thought from a good friend's mind. I left for a moment, then came back to find Steph sitting in the doorway to the room. I said, "What are you doing?"
"Owwww. I'm just sitting here."
Steph had forgotten to duck while passing through the extra small doorway to the toolshop. She banged her head and sat on the floor.
I helped her up and offered her some cheddar popcorn. It worked, she felt better already, or maybe she couldn't feel that much being drunk. We walked to her house in the dark of morning. I had a quarter inch y so we could both listen to the portable cd player and sing out loud and out of tune to the neighborhood roads. Wonnnnnderful. The night ended with me passing out on her bedroom floor. The next morning began with "SHIT! IT'S 10:57 and I have to work at 11:00!"

why does anyone update?

2005-01-28T23:42:51Z

Last night Kelli and I had one of those conversations that we'll both remember for a really long time. She asked me to call her Ol' Snake Eggs. I was honored. We sang in Norwegian together. Me: "Do you have any potato chips?" and her: "No, I have none." It'd be a lot better if you could hear the tune...and the Norwegian.

The neighbors came over last night. It was a good time as always.
Sipping golden barley, perhaps a hit here and there, jamming out blues and bluegrass, playing chess--every night. This is how college should be.

Chesswise: Jamesway has won against me, I have won against Catfish, and Catfish and Jamesway ended on a stalemate last time, so we'll see what tonight brings. There's something about using your intellect in playing a game that can't be beat. Something about the your mind's strategic thought paths and even sporatic moves all intertwined with that of a friend's, sitting across from you. Being had by a clever move of theirs' is as priceless an experience as winning a game.

ooooooh people

2005-01-17T18:44:22Z

Last semester, I had met this girl Radha from a psychology study I was required to participate in. She was handing out blank pieces of paper when I came in, explaining the study--how we would draw trees that represented our interests, our talents, our loves. I drew a sassafrass tree and then explained to the class how I like it because it smells like rootbeer. Anyway, that was all I knew of Radha then. Probably just another righteous Belmont student...but wait...

Last night, I was being forced to drink unnecessary shots of rum and who else but Radha was holding it, shouting "TAKE THE SHOT SHARON! JUST TAKE THE SHOT!!!"

deluxe_efflux @ 2005-01-05T04:12:00

2005-01-05T09:28:14Z

Hung out with Ace, Nex, and Sabat tonight. It really rocked so much. We chilled at Sabat's grandmothers tossin back, playing 7 11 doubles, and laughing the night away. Sabat was the official goddess of dice, high-rollin for a good ten times straight. At one point, we decided to get more brews. We realized it was two minutes to 12 and that's when the gas station closes. There was one solemn moment when everyone glanced at each other around the table then simultaneously ran for the door. In we crammed, as Allie started up the car and blasted to USA gas, down the road. There was so much enthusiasm, it was hilarious. As soon as we pulled in, Sabat, who was sitting shotgun, opened the door--allie asked her if she needed money--and "NO!" she shouted as she got out while it was still moving and bolted for the shop's door. We envied the strength and speed she possessed--for 30 seconds later, she appeared with an 18 pack in one hand shouting "BITCHES, THE NIGHT IS OURS!"

During the night, I looked up at the ceiling and smiled the purest smile for a good minute or two, not because we had beer, but because life can be so beautiful with friends in the tuck.

Tomorrow I have two goals.
1: To actually mail the CD I made Dave, to San Fran.
and 2: To watch Ian play at East Enders coffeehouse, then chill at Sabat's place again.

Life is so good when you know that's all that tomorrow has to consist of.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-12-29T14:49:00

2004-12-30T22:39:48Z

Last night, I went sledding under full moonlight at Wolf Pit. According to Mike who brought me, it's called Wolf Pit because a thousand wolves met at the pond one night some hundred years ago. He never got to telling the whole story because a snowball hit his face. The Professor came along, then Ace and Nex stopped by with some smahoothe hot chocolate for me, and Betsy (who just arrived home from Siberia before coming) was also there. We made several sled formations between the six of us, including pyramid and chain link style, and almost all of them came apart while careening downhill. Nex's foot got stuck in a tree at a memorable moment.

At one point, Ace took up a disc shaped sled and asked "Hey do you think I can go headfirst on this?"
John replied with, "Allie, don't ask. Just do."

Soonafter, Ace and Nex had to leave. I saluted them for having full childhood spirit meters and deciding to join in the fun, though they weren't prepared for it clothingwise. Mike kept snow-wrestling me. This resulted in coldly dampened underwear, but I didn't care much, we slipped and slid through the snow for a good two hours before someone suggested hot chocolate again. Mmmmmm. So with one last ride to bring the sleds downhill, we said goodbye to the moonlit Wolf Pit, where once a thousand wolves roamed, and headed to a house in Jamesport.

There, we laughed, cried, and gave birth as hot chocolate and metabolic frolic tea was passed around. As we sat in the cozy livingroom, a kitten named Squirt tried to savagely claim the English muffin pizza in John's hand. By the time three came around, most of us were dozing off, while one or two lamely sung under their breath, "Always and forever" from Napoleon Dynamite. I don't know how it happened, but all of a sudden I was in a freezing car, and John was telling me we might not have enough gas to get home. Oh, I love suspense.

Thankfully we made it.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-12-27T02:34:00

2004-12-27T08:30:35Z

I'm back for winter vacation. Yes, I am. Thanksgiving rocked as well, came back for that too. A glimpse of my ventures one of those nights can be viewed at http://community.webshots.com/user/sharonedigitale. Yeah, so seeing people for that first night of thanksgiving vacation was awesome especially nex and ace to whom I told I wasn't returning, then when I did see them, received comments such as "BITCH! BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH, GIVE ME A HUG!" and "OH HELL, I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" as Nex backed away like I came back from the dead. Home really did something that helped me through the last two weeks of ass finals that I had to return to at school. Luckily, I had Kelli, who supplied me with extra "stark" (strong) ginseng pills from sweden and coffee to smoothe the way a bit. I got closer to my next door neighbors those last two weeks. My bluebrass boys I call em, otherwise known as the disciples, cause frankly, they look like they just got out of Israel with the beards they got growing and their peaceful laid back natures Jesus-style. James (guitar) and John (banjo) jam all the time together and I get to listen in and sing along when I like. Good times, good times.

John drove a ragged me to the airport the morning of december 14th. On the way back, I listened to some crazy music and watched how the shadow of the plane raced along the white clouds below with a rainbow circle glowing oddly around it. I excitedly described this seemingly rare sight to my dad when I got off the plane to which he replied with the fact that he's seen it many times. We drove home, I went out with my friends, and thankfully forgot about the ruined beauty of my supposed rare discovery in the sky.

Natalie came over the other day. It was so fun hanging out with her. Unfortunately, on the way here, she got into a bit of a mess involving her engine dying and the tow truck she rode in thereafter getting stuck in a ditch in heavy rain with a sixty five year old senile guy named Jerry at the wheel (look at her journal entry for details), but other than her chance at death, we had a fine night out with the ronies. Went over lace's, then danielle's, then back to lace's to pregame a bit, then we hit the Blue Dolphin to hear Cmoney's band play. ROCK.
I called the brother to show up (John aka the professor) and soon enough he did. Mike showed up too, as well as Ian, and pretty much the rest of Mattituck, twas awesome. Nat, Ian, John and I came home, baked a Diggiorno pizza which we all forgot wasn't delivery by the time it was ready, and crashed in my basement.

Henry Oh picked me up for rushed Christmas shopping on Christmas eve. Possibly the biggest rush in shopping I've had all year. We were considering grabbing the stuff we needed from each store, and running out the doors shouting, "We'll pay you back later! Don't worry!" to the shopowners. The rushed feeling on the way to the stores was fueled by the macedonian techno I brought along, feeling Henry and I should drive to something complimentary to our moods.

Christmas went well. Beth got "Old Enough to Know", an old christian book for teens explaining about sex situations, that someone in the family gets every year. I got Chitty Chitty Bang Bang the novel. Dad got Rigoletto the movie. Just google search it online if you're curious--quite possibly the (there's no other way to put this) gayest film ever made. I got John and jeff, the old old "holy-tolito-batman!" Batman and Robin dvd along with Napolean Dynamite and several Bruce Lee movies on dvd as well. Got mom Elf which we watched that night, haha, can never go wrong with will ferrell.

It's snowing pretty hard outside and the warm glow given by the lights of the christmas tree next to me isn't actually supplying any real heat.
I think I need to snuggle under some covers.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-11-14T13:43:00

2004-11-15T06:33:32Z

-Hear his words Ramsesses. And OBEY.

-OBEY?

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-10-20T21:53:00

2004-10-21T02:56:18Z

These days, I take walks in the fog and write.

White mud from gravel
Where the grass once bent
It looks so pretty
Lacks natural intent

White mud is your innocence
Spilling onto my earth
Stay away baby, I just
Need natural worth.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-10-08T22:57:00

2004-10-09T05:58:04Z

My birthday was last monday. It was such a memorable day, simply because of two packages, one from the l.i. and one from san fran. The one from NY was of course from my family, it was a big box. In it were presents, clothes, cards, love from the parents, a sexy silk shirt from the wonderful Beth, and who could forget "Zardos." John had the audacity to stick a nicely framed picture of Sean Connery starring in what looks to be, a ridiculously low-budgeted sci-fi. So low-budgeted, they couldn't afford to get Connery some real clothes. He's dressed in an orange man thong with thigh high boots! It's one of those things you have to see. Google image search of "Zardos" online. Trust me, it's hilarious, especially in a frame. So I got that and what looked to be a very old classic-looking novel called "The Girl Aviators and the Phantom Airship." Of course, John was the one to stick that in too.

Opening the package from California, I found my present from the big bro Dave. A red lazer gun. Possibly the best gift anyone could have given me! I LOVE DAVE. Only seven years and gender seperate that guy from being my identical twin. He didn't even know I was looking for one! Gonna strap that puppy on my belt soon, as well as my drum sticks.

An unbelievable thing happened in the past week. Flintlock came last Friday and made the week one to remember. We had a situation holiday or should I say holiweek. From the backyard rocker chairs to the front porch swing to my balcony seats and their coffee table, we chillaxed to the max. It was seriously the smoothest week of my life outside summer, haha I wonder why. Love you buddy. Of course, it wasn't the same without our regulator Revel. Love you Revel. WHERE ARE LAWLESS, NEX, AND ACE!!!!!! missing missing, but not for long.

In other news:
It's friday. And I'm in love.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-23T17:40:00

2004-09-23T22:41:59Z

So I got a new picture up. Yes, that's me. Yes, that's a real sword. ...and no, orcs weren't really nearby.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-23T17:26:00

2004-09-23T22:31:40Z

Last night, I spilled a container of oats on my bedroom floor. My roommate grabbed her camera and took a picture of it. The product of my clumsiness has now inspired her to do a series of photos on spilt items. ....This makes me smile complacently.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-22T21:13:00

2004-09-23T05:45:35Z

People are to me, so odd.

Party hardy.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-15T19:40:00

2004-09-16T03:32:40Z

Last night, I went in the kitchen to get a glass of Dr. Pepper. I turned around for a sec and there was Kelli. She just looked at me and started cracking up. "Uhoh, whatsup dude."
"No nothing, I just took a sleeping pill, and it's making me feel really funny. The doctor prescribed these to me and I don't know but they're making me feel hilarious. Want one?"
Welp, I thought, I'm gonna need sleep anyway for tonight and being that I just woke up from a nap this late at night, there's hardly a chance of me getting back to sleep when I want to. "Sure," I said.
I took one and went to join Kelli on the porch swing as she smoked a cigarette. "You'll be feeling it very soon," she said.

...And I did. Man, was it weird and hilarious. We were laughing a bit. Luckily, Kelli brought out some paper and markers. This is what I wrote. I remember it very vaguely along with stumbling and feeling aware of a new reality... ahem

"Bounding near our sleep
Little blue boy hit a wall
Wall now gone
For preservations of round shape
The brain swirls round and round
Soft soft it should be.
The places in which we get along with people
are round and always will be
never accepting square thoughts."

Oh god, that was fantastic.

the last thursday in mattituck

2004-09-16T00:40:10Z

This update is dedicated to one of the last summer journals that did not make it online for whatever reason:

(within the last week at Mattituck)

So last Thursday night was Blue Dolphin time. Flint called me and said neither she nor Rev wanted to drive. Of course, this meant me volunteering. I was delighted to. So Flint picked Nex then me up, and we switched at Ace's. Made a slight stop in Southold for the company of Rev and Lawless--who were utterly surprised I was driving. Hell, I was too. In fact, this was one of the first nights I attended an occasion sober in awhile. It was intensely fascinating. Flint sat across from me at the same table next to a big sliding window that demanded our attention the week before. It was one of the best seats, considering it was right next to the bar and the window let you have a good view of the band and everyone under the awning outside. Only this time, we didn’t seem to be puppetshow actors on a stage. Hmmmm. It was a wonderful time. I talked with a bunch of graduating classes from MHS.

My ronies were all splendidly drunk. Flint had that undeniable smile, talking with me, then forgetting what she was saying a minute later. Ace, Nex, Rev, Lawless--all stopped by the table at some point in the night loving me. teheheee. I greeted my brother John getting drunk at the bar. Yes! It was the first time we switched places for once. I was the driver and he the drunk. I made my way outside...

Talked with townies for awhile, said hi to Davey g, Steadmones, Cmoney, Flames, and then there was Ian. I felt bonded to him that night. Maybe it was the fact that we were both sober and that he looked neat and trim compared to everyone else there. Anyway we talked a little bit, then I went over to Dave and Jarret stepped in to say hello. Jarret and I were kind of on weird terms at the time, but it was cool talking to him.

Soooo, I asked my ronies if they wanted to go, they all said "Give me ten minutes," which meant 30. Davey walked me to the car under the 'blacklit canopy with holes punched in it.' He's such a nice guy. I wish he had more people near miller place to hang around with. He's one of those romantics you wanna see fly out of Long Island to experience the world and give the specialness he's got to it.

It had been a while. I had wondered where my girls were and whether they remembered to come to the car at all. Davey and I decided to walk back. As we were coming back, Dave spotted James about 100 feet ahead. "Flaaaaaaames," he said. Wow, I thought. He can really tell that's James from that far away? I guess when you're close friends with someone you can just recognize them from a considerable distance. I looked to my right. About the same distance that James was from us, I saw two figures seemingly sneaking across the grass under some trees to the direction of the car. Rev and Flintlock. Yep, certainly could tell it was them even from that distance. I understood. haha

I told Dave goodbye and ran through the grass to them. "Guys! Where were you?"
"Sharon!" they both shouted. Rev ran towards me and practically tackled me with her hug. It was most possibly the tightest hug I've ever been given. She swung me around and kissed me on the cheek. "SHARON, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, ROCK SOLID RONIES FOREVER!! I'M GONNA MISS YOU SO MUCH!!!"
"Ackhahah me too! I love you buddy! You're choking me but I love you!"
Steph came over, "I WANT SOME LOVE TOO!!!" she cried.
So there, all three of us just hugged each other as hard as we could saying how much we'd miss each other and how sad it was that the summer was fading away....

We got in the car and I drove upto the side of the bar to stop and let Rev and Flint get the other girls who happened to be flirting with a few english boys. "Hey yo, props at the after show, can you tell me where the green buds grow..." a loud third eye sang to me as I waited for my ronies in the driver's seat next to Blue Dolphin's awning for the last time. "Tick tick, tell me where the time goes...." All my ronies soon passed in front of me to get in the car laughing and smiling as all heaven.

"To sevs!" someone shouted. So I pulled out onto the North Road and let me say, there was a sing along like nothing I've ever heard before. I was singing with them but couldnt help laughing in pure joy as I drummed the steering wheel. The enthusiasm could have never been higher. I was never more glad to be sober. "THOSE ARE THE ONES FOR MEEEEEEEEEEE!!! THOSE ARE THE ONES FOR ME!!!!! THE FREAKS! THE ENEMY! YOU AND MEEEEE!" we all shouted.
"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!"
"LOVE YOU GUYS!"
"LOVE MY RONIEEEEEEEES!"
"RARRRRRRRR!"
all came from the backseat.

...ten minutes later: "WHERE DOES TIME GO NOW, ON A WAKE FOR YOUNG SOULS," the chill beat was one of the best moments of my life. The winding north road was rolling underneath. I thought of a time earlier in the summer when I was riding backseat and started acting like I was pulling the road toward us with a rope. The girls were just like "Stop! Sharon! It looks real! Stop! You're freaking us out!"

"AND I KEEP ON FORGETTING MYSELF, WHO AM I, WE BOTH DON'T KNOW. TIME TICKS BY, WHERE DID YOU GO??" We stopped at sevs, picked up slurpees and nachos and got back to the car. Lawless got in the front seat but Flint wanted it cause it was her car. Lawless got absurdly angry at her, called her an asshole, and forgot about it five seconds later while Flint was still saying, "You don't understand, you just don't, it's my car." I laughed and the rest of the girls were just like "Calm down guys, calm down."

A minute later, we were outside Rev's. Rev and Flint got out and I was shutting off the lights as I heard Ace say to the silent backseat, "Man, it's late. Guys, I don't have much time."
Lawless: "Yeah."
Nex: "I know, I can't really stay for more than 20 minutes."
Ace: "I mean in this town, bitches! Get out of the car!"
I laughed hysterically.

We went inside and everyone settled down for a bit. Soon and unfortunately, people had to be taken home. Twas a shame. I knew with this night over, the summer was really ending.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-13T01:48:00

2004-09-13T07:00:29Z

Kelli and I talked forever on the porch swing tonight. She described how once, she and her friend in high school pasted pictures of classmates from sixth grade on paper, wrote "ALIENS ARE HERE IN HENDERSONVILLE" on it, made copies, and posted them all over town. They also included a picture of a dog with the classmates.
"Wow, your friend sounds just as hilarious as you are," I say. "How'd you meet her?"
"At a Baptist sports camp when we were 12," says Kelli. "Neither of us played sports and neither of us were Baptist."

Deluxe Efflux is in smooth progress. Recorded some vocal and guitar tracks today so Tyler, Matt, and Josh could figure out their parts to the songs. This is awesome.

vibes of goodness

2004-09-12T18:45:27Z

So my sister's engaged, I'm french club president, and I gots a band. So in order:

I can't believe my sister's engaged! Her boyfriend took her out on his boat and showed her the ring yesterday afternoon. A bit of most excellent news for the family. She's so happy about it.

I am french club president. ...yep...certainly am in an important position...it's certainly an interesting thing to write about...cough.

FINALLY A BAND. They're awesome guys, Matt, Tyler, and Josh. Matt, me, and Tyler who I hadn't met yet, planned a little jam session in his room yesterday. We got to playing, then Josh, Tyler's roommate, picks up a guitar and starts jammin along. It sounded really good. Everything flowed and about two hours later, someone said "This is the best jam session of the year yet." So we decided to work it out for real. Play places. AHHHH YEAHHHHHHHH. WE ARE CALLED DELUXE EFFLUX. That's right. Awesomest band name ever and don't you give me lip about it being my live journal name. haha, jammin again this afternoon.

Last but not least, in national news, Revel has been enlightened about life. She woke up this morning welcomed to the planet. Glad you're here buddy, take this nerdrope.

remembering

2004-09-10T04:51:53Z

Today I ordered a pizza pie. My first very own delivered pizza pie. It was beautiful.

I forgot to write about the good times of my last week in the tuck. I believe I left off somewhere... ahh yes, the day after breakfast with Brennan, Scheer, and Steven. Soooo, I got back to the house and arrived just in time to figure things out with my school's financial aid service...or rather hand off the phone to my dad then run out the door to hop in the Pony with my ronies. Steph, Kathleen, Lace headed to the beach with Incubus accompanying us like times before.

We get to Hampton Bays, ride along the road parallel to the ocean waves and park at Summer's Club. Kathleen pulls out a cigar with a smile. "What the hell. No way dude, you're too much," I say. But of course, that's the way it always is with the crew, unexpected fun, unexpected laughs and that's why hanging out with them is so good. I'm never surprised and never refusing a little a fantastic time. We got out to the beach and chose a spot inconspicuous style on the sand. I will never forget the size of the gray waves in that state of mind. We jumped in of course. I remember drying off on the sheet lacey brought. The sky cleared completely. I remember looking up at the window to heaven so light and purely blue. I saw my friend's faces above laughing, closed my eyes and I remember ...hoping to remember, so I could pull it out of my back pocket for moments like these.

It worked. I love you guys.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-07T18:25:00

2004-09-07T23:32:31Z

Today, Sharon and I sat on my balcony drinking a white Zinfindel and talking of the qualities of life. We watched as a flock of birds chattered in the trees near us. There were about a thousand. It was marvelous to hear them making a racket, then suddenly becoming silent to take flight. Once they flew passed us, all we heard was the delicate flutter of thousands of wings beating against the air. It seemed romantic. It seemed colorful. It seemed a bit of North Fork water to the parched Nashville mind.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-05T05:08:00

2004-09-05T10:32:01Z

Tonight-

I called my friend "lil' britches," Kelli, whose alter ego is "Tequili" (that's a long i sound at the end), we got to the light side of the moon--safe landing and talk on the balcony for awhile. Then I go downstairs, kelli comes into the kitchen and shows me a doll. She says, "My friend knitted this doll at work for me. It looks so cute doesn't it? But lift up its dress, and it's got a penis," as she proceeds to show me the oversized member belonging to what I once thought was a symbol of childhood innocence. Kelli gave me what looked to be a cutout picture of the Virgin Mary. No, it was a just a decorated hot pad to put on one's body. Wow, patches of healing.
We were discussing fun moments of the previous night. Kelli went to a party, smacked a total stranger in the face on the porch then said, "I just smacked you and I don't know you. What are you gonna do about it?" The girl, it turns out proceeded to get up and show her dukes to which Kelli just laughed at and walked away. I stopped the story to say, "Man, what would you do if someone walked up and did that to you, man what would I do?"
Kelli says immediately, "I'd get them in a headlock and give em a noogie."
You rascal, don't smack me next time.

We then made up a song about Jiminy Cricket and how he would see a flower, pick it, and then stick it up his ass. Hey, he's a cartoon cricket, it's not that gross. In fact if anything, in the cartoon land, it'd make his little insect tush so clean, a fart of violet-fresh air would effuse a room whenever he hopped.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-03T00:58:00

2004-09-03T06:04:05Z

Kelli and I went shopping at Aveda and got free massages. Then we got whiskey and drank while watching a sixties french movie. Oh yes, then we felt like getting a pizza. Then Dave called me and reached my roommate who proceeded to get me out the front door swinging on the porch swing with kelli. I sang "akwalakadakawoookalakadaawwahhhh" to him. He loved it.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-09-01T17:30:00

2004-09-01T22:51:42Z

I have currently been in Nashville for a week and two days. It took me a minute to figure that out. I have started recording a few songs. This is good. As long as I am busying myself with creating, the conciousness will not recognize what it sees as a dream to be real--the dream being my current environment. Scary: I was walking down a sidewalk the other day. 95 degrees. Though, since I feel Nashville itself is an odd little dream, I started to not feel heat. The blur of everything started to get blurrier, even temperature-wise. Right now, I'd want to be awake for a moment, even if it means falling back to sleep again.

Last night, I remembered a time when my knees itched. I was little enough to be riding in the front part of a shopping cart in Waldbaums. I remember looking at my knees and feeling the itch. I was curious and decided to see what would happen if I didn't scratch them. The itch soon went away. Isn't it funny? I would have never remembered that moment if I had obeyed my natural inhibitions and scratched my knees. It could have been like any other moment. But it wasn't. The trick is to make every moment different from the next in unique ways. I don't know about you but my memorable life is on the way.

deluxe_efflux @ 2004-08-19T14:02:00

2004-08-19T19:37:35Z

Yesterday morning, I awoke early with a stir. Breakfast with Brennan and Scheer time.

I got ready and stepped outside the house, loving how the morning dew smell overwhelms the groggyness. Much to my delighted surprise, Steven drove up and stepped out of his car. Ah yes, Lord Steven. So Scheer drove up soon and we hopped in.

To the North Fork grill we went. We sat down and ordered some coffee. Brennan stepped in shortly after. I hugged him, then ordered two eggs scrambled with ham, onions, and cheese. Mmm-hmmm. They serve that with toast you know.

Scheer talked. He had to. When you've had struggles throughout the summer, Brennan's the person to vent to, because even if he doesn't answer, you feel he's listened to everything and turned it over a few times in his mind just from the look of his interested eyes. I sat there, at first enjoying every minute, then not. In fact, something was stirring inside. I didn't know if it was Scheer venting his feelings, Steven's overly patient quietness, or Brennan's eyes that I could see with my own eyes in that moment but only in memory after we'd say goodbye and I feared goodbye would come too soon--too soon, stop Scheer, stop talking and let me enjoy Brennan!
I was extremely uneasy. I could have cried, but I just shivered. Then I found out what it really was. I looked down and realized I should have by no means been drinking coffee that early in the morning. It does horrendous works on both my stomach and mind. The bathroom called my name.

Anyway, there wasn't much too fear as far as Brennan leaving too early for me. In fact, we got to go to his house, saw his personal quarters. The house was made of cedar wood right on the bay waters across the street from Town Beach. Scheer, Steven, and I absolutely loved it.